3-D Printing Set to Customize Your Pleasure
Feb. 14, 2012 -
Einstein's hair wasn't the only wild thing about him. The famous physicist also had numerous sexual liaisons during his two marriages. Einstein's first marriage was miserable. He and his wife, Mileva Marić, even formed a contract in which she became little more than a household servant, including the conditions set by Einstein that, “You will renounce all personal relations with me insofar as they are not completely necessary for social reasons ... . You will stop talking to me if I request it.” After the inevitable divorce, Einstein married his cousin, Elsa Lowenthal, whom he was already sleeping with. But his second marriage didn't keep Einstein in line either. Six girlfriends were mentioned in letters to his wife. At least he was honest about it.
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Erwin Schrödinger You may have heard of the theory of Shrödinger's cat , a hypothetical feline that may be either alive or dead depending on the random decay of a nuclear particle. It turns out Shrödinger was quite the Tom cat himself. The physicist got physical with numerous lovers. His wife, Anny, knew all about it. She had a lover of her own. The swinging scientist even went so far as to hire Arthur March as his lab assistant because he lusted after March's wife, Hilde. She bore Shrödinger a child, though she remained married to March. Shrödinger's two-woman harem eventually cost him an appointment at Oxford, since the idea of a polyamorous physicist was outside the cultural acceptability of the day.
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Richard Feynman Compared to other famous physicists, Feynman was more of a stereotypical number cruncher. He loved numbers so much that his second wife considered them his mistress. She wasn't as forgiving of Feynman's dalliances with sweet lady calculus as Einstein and Schrödinger's wives had been with their actual sexual escapades. She divorced Feynman, a master of quantum mechanics, because of his love affair with math. Feynman's first wife had died of tuberculosis in 1945. But the third time was the charm for him. He married Gweneth Howarth and lived happily ever after in the beach house he bought with his share of the Nobel Prize award that he won in 1965.
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Marie Curie Famous for her pioneering study of radiation, this star-crossed scientist's love life was just as conflicted, tragic and scandalous as the history of the energy she studied. Her husband, Frenchman Pierre Curie, slipped on a slick street in Paris during a storm and died after a horse drawn carriage crushed his skull. Heartbroken, Curie buried herself in her work to deal with her grief, until in 1910 she found solace in the arms a former student of Pierre's, Paul Langevin. But Langevin was a married man and five years her junior. The affair scandalized the French and fueled xenophobia against Curie, a native of Poland.
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Stephen Hawking On his 70th birthday, Stephen Hawking commented that, to him, women were a "complete mystery." No wonder, since his personal history sounds like what would happen if Jerry Springer hosted Nova. Hawking divorced Jane Wilde, his wife of 25 years, and married one of his nurses. His nurse, Elaine Mason, divorced her own husband, the man who had designed Hawking's iconic speaking machine, for Hawking. But some of Hawking's former nurses claimed Mason psychologically abused and mentally manipulated the wheelchair-bound genius. In 2006, Hawking broke free of Mason and began to mend fences with his children from his first marriage.
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Alfred Charles Kinsey A sexologist with torrid tales surrounding their research...who'da thunkit? Kinsey faced allegations that he conducted his research on human sexuality to fulfill a personal kink, but was also praised for making sex a legitimate topic of discussion and bringing the study of homosexuality out of the closet. Sure, in the privacy of his attic Kinsey filmed some of his own sexual behavior with his fellow researchers. And he encouraged his staff to engage in amorous experimentation in order to gain the confidence of research subjects and more fully understand the topic they were studying. But Kinsey's work also helped to make one of the most basic aspects of human biology a respected area of study. The groundbreaking Kinsey reports accompanied the United States into the sexual liberation of the 1960s.
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It’s come to this.
Three-dimensional printing, which can custom print cars, food, art, medical implants, guns and duck feet is positioned to print dildos. Berlin-based programmer Ikaros Kappler is about to become a multi-millionaire with his website Dildo Generator, where pleasure seekers can design their own sex toy.
Phallus-philes start with a basic model that can be lengthened, widened, colorized and curved. A panel displays the metrics, including volume of silicon, which I suspect gives the device heft.
According to Clair Cohen of the UK’s Telegraph, “Those who have already tested the site report being able to create dildos shaped like dolphins, chess pieces, candles, vases and even wine glasses.” Huh. Creative.
When the design meets your aesthetic, simply print it out on your silicon printer. Oh, don’t have one? No sweat. Order a mold or take the saved file to a third party service to print it for you. We’re all adults here. Be bold, little soldier.
You can catch up on the chatter on the company’s Twitter @dildogenerator.
Credit: Screen Grab, Dildo Generator